Lawless

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A screenplay by Nick Cave, set in Depression times USA, with ruthless guys and gorgeous women. And, of course, great music. What else do you need? Some violence? Well, I'm glad that's what you want!

It is indeed violent. Very much so. Some scenes made me wince, others made me laugh. Not in a 'this is so cheesy' way at all, but more in a 'Oh, Nick, you crazy bastard!' kind of way. It is apparently a real story and the screenplay is based on a book I haven't read. I don't know how much was, shall we say, romanticized by the original author who, unless it's some very weird coincidence, seems to be a direct descendent of the protagonists. Then I don't know how much Nick added. I mean his themes are all present here: redemption, religion, ruthlessness, dark humor, love, man's foolishness and pettiness. Hopelessness. And some more ruthlessness.

Which brings us to Guy Pearce, whose character is evil and loathesome beyond words. Sure, it is a little cartoonish, but he's truly awesome in his creepiness. What we don't see makes you wonder even more. For example the long shot on a woman's naked body, sitting on the edge of the bed and crying as Guy dresses himself. You don't know what happened and you don't really want to know what happened. And it's such a rare things these days to be able to use your imagination.

The only small thing I could say is that sometimes the film felt a bit too episodic. Meaning: now there's a scene about them working. Cut to a scene of them drinking. Cut to a scene of them doing something else. It felt like some linking scenes were missing. Also, when Shia walks around missing a shoe, in the next scene he's got both shoes on, but it's apparently a different day and I hadn't understood that (I admit I didn't pay attention to the clothes so I don't know if they're different between the two scenes). And also, when he gets thrown down some stairs you can totally see that he lands on a mat under some leaves. But oh well.

Sure, I'm pretty convinced that women at that time did not look as clean and lean as the women in this film. But, hey: I'm not complaining.

The dialogue is pretty fun at times, too. Especially the main guy's, who's a man of few words and usually says: 'Uhm... Hmm.' And you always know what he means and what he's thinking about.

Then there's Shia... I admit that when I heard he was in the film it made me go 'uh oh.' But I was surprised by the fact that he didn't suck. Also, I thought that if one day someone makes a David Gahan film, Shia should play him.

Gary Oldman is also in there. For too short a time, he's really an extended cameo. But the first two times you see him, for a few seconds, he manages to steal the show. Of course. I mean him getting out of a car with a Tommy gun, smoking a cigarillo an readjusting his suit jacket... That's just so Oldman and so priceless. Plus, come on: can you think of anything cooler than Gary Oldman firing a Tommy gun? I sure can't. Except maybe Oldman firing two Tommy guns.

Speaking of cameos... If you blink you'll miss it, but make sure you look at the first dead body you see, the one sitting on the passenger seat of a shot out car.

So there you have it. A fun film with lots and lots of blood, some really good acting and a strong screenplay (as if I'd say anything else about something written by Mr Cave) and great music (as if I'd say anything else about something written by Mr Cave). If you're queasy at the sight of blood, you should definitely give this film a pass. If you want to see something fun and violent and see guy Pearce being a total asshole, then go see this film!

Budz House

IMDb Link

I'm willing to give any film a chance, I mean... You know, you just got to. But what in God(ard)'s name was I thinking about when I decided to watch this?!
After less than 4 minutes into it, this movie already bored the shit out of me. By the 11-minute mark I was thinking of smashing my whisky glass on my coffee table and eating the shards, just to do something more enjoyable.

This is a film for, and possibly by, college weed-smokers. Morons wearing baseball caps sideways, wearing super baggy shorts and covering their mouths with their fists everytime they find something funny, going: 'Ohhhh, snap!'
So, yeah: If you're a pothead fratboy with an IQ of 10, you will love this film.
If, on the other hand, you are more intelligent that an amoeba, you will want to throw something heavy at your screen... All the clichés are there. It even has 'Because I got High' (or whatever the actual name of the song is, I can't be bothered to google it) as the first song of the film. I guess the film guys were too stoned to realize that it's actually a pretty anti-getting-stoned song. Later on, I know you're not gonna believe me but...
There are Snoop Dogg songs. So unexpected!

But I can picture fratboys everywhere giggling as they're watching this film, firing up their bongs before gobbling up some more Cheetos.

Once upon a time, introducing characters with a freeze frame and showing their names on the screen was totally cool. But now? It's just another cliché. Anyway, who needs to remember the names? You have Black Stoner 1, Black Stoner 2, White Stoner 1 and Hispanic Stoner 1. And then all the Stoner Extras. And the booty, of course (not complaining about that. Really, really nice booties they are. Indeed: They're Bootylicious!). Because the quote-unquote audience's gotta go: 'Daaamn, she's fiiine! Ohhhh! Snap! He's smoking again, dawg!'

At this point, because we live in a hypocritical society that pretends to not tolerate hyper-critcism, let me add that my 'dawgs' and 'snaps' comments are not KKK propaganda (despite my somewhat unfortunate initials). The people I picture saying these things are Fred Durst-like morons. Guys who come from Manhattan Beach, or indeed Manhattan, and act like they come from Compton or Harlem. I personally find this way more offensive than anything else. But maybe that's just me.

Anyway, back to this magnificient motion picture...
The dialogue is so sub-par that I suspect some intern who's never smoked or seen weed in his life was asked to write it while the crew were getting high. Then, because they were so high, they didn't realize how bad the dialogue was and so they just went with it.
It could also be that they have no acting talent whatsover. But who cares? They smoke weed! On screen! 'Ooooh, snap!' On top of that, they take toilet humor to a whole new level: the literal one. A character named 'Big Shit' clogs toilets with shit. 'Snap! Let's spark up!'
And there's a Hispanic (well, Mexican, really) gangster called Dirty Sanchez. This shit (literally) is hilarious, dawg!

There are SNL skits that looked more realistic and that were better acted than this.
And 'the hood?' It looked a lot like Westwood to me. But that's understandable. Had they tried to film this piece of shit (literally) in the actual 'hood' (if there is such a thing anymore), the whole cast and crew would have been shot on sight. And rightly so. I know this was actually a very racist comment, because you've probably inferred from my statement that all people from 'the hood' have guns. Well, no. I'm just saying all people from the US have guns. And the people from 'the hood' would have a motive as well as reasonable cause.

You know how bad this got for me? It got so bad that I sometimes caught myself wishing I were watching 'Titanic' instead. That's just wrong.

Fair enough: I am obviously and absolutely not the target audience for this. Because I have a brain, or at least I like to think so (because no matter how much brain I have, it still tells me that I do have enough brain... Are you following this?).
If you're an 18-year-old college stoner and you think you're so 'gangsta' because you dress just like MTV told you to, and you think you're a total rebel because you spark up a spliff every day, then this film is for you.

I realize I sound elitist, but you know what? I'm old enough to say I truly don't give a shit if I come off as being elitist. I'm saying people who like this kind of films are morons. I'm not saying I'm smart. I'm just saying I'm smarter than the people who have enjoyed this film. You should also know that some parts of the 'Harold & Kumar' films made me laugh, so I am not above 'stoner humor.' But this film? Nope. Couldn't even crack a smile. Sure, I wasn't high, but I wasn't sober either (because why should I be?).

And if there are people who bought the DVD because they just had to watch it again, then shit... I think euthanasia is in order. The DVDs should be booby-trapped (Ooooh! Snap! He said 'booby!')
so that whoever buys this would/should die. That would make the world a better place. Plus there'd be a sudden surplus of weed for us all to enjoy as we watched 'The Big Lebowski' for the hundreth time.

Best thing about this film? It's only 76 minutes long. Worst thing about it? These are 76 minutes of my life I'll never get back.

How the fuck was a film like that greenlit in the first place?! Well... We live in a world where Tyler Perry exists and where 'Vertigo' is deemed better than 'Citizen Kane.' Really? 'Vertigo?' I like it all right and I'm happy for Boileau-Narcejac (yeah, just like everybody else, I'm sure), but better than 'Psycho,' 'Rear Window,' 'North by Northwest?' Really?!

Fuck that shit. I'm getting high, dawg!

Oh, snap! Let's play some Dirty South Bass!