Sucker Punch

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I wonder what feminists make of this... On the one hand, you have women who take action and who kick ass. On the other hand, they're treated as sex objects and are not wearing many clothes throughout the film.

Because, yes: it's an overblown (literally) movie with half-naked girls and lots of guns and swords. So: Not for everybody. But if you like video games, or scantily-clad women or music videos, this might be the film for me. For you, I mean.

This is '300' meets 'Girl Interrupted.'

It is eye candy, in all the sense of the term: the colors are interesting, the action sequences look great, the girls are hot. In fact, I would have liked to have seen this film on a big screen. Even in 3-D, I can imagine it being kind of cool.

But first, let me get the perverted comments out of the way... The main actress is Emily Browning, the girl who was in 'Lemony Snickett's etc etc' and here she wears short skirts and thigh highs and bares her mid-riff. So... you know... I felt kinda tingly for almost two hours. And, well... her mouth... Seriously, there should be a law against lips like these.

Now, the music video thing... At the beginning of the film, I thought it looked really good. Then after three minutes, I started to get bored. It truly looked like some kind of Evanescence video, with blood. Then she goes to the asylum and I started to get annoyed. Too many slow motion shots, too many extreme close-ups and extreme low angles. Too monochromatic. We get it: you want to dazzle us with your vision of bleakness! I am guessing that teenage girls everywhere, wearing too much black eye-liner and wearing torn thigh-highs, walking around, clutching a 'Nightmare Before Christmas' lunch box to their bosoms and smoking cloves, thought this was the dog's bollocks.
But it's just too much of everything.

Then, just when I think I've just seen John Hamm, things shift gears and seem to become interesting, then it jumps right back into music video mode and, to be honest, it doesn't even try to pretend it's not doing exactly that. At least we see the girl's legs a whole lot, so I'm not complaining. Also, the music is pretty good. Covers of famous songs. Most of them good to really good, except there's a Queen song in there, and that shit does not go down well with me.

Now, the video game thing... Well... It just looks like one. One I'd happily play, but not sure I'd just sit around and watch for 120 minutes. And it is predicable in its supposedly 'surprise' ending, which is no surprise if you have half a brain, which obviously the target audience won't have. But still, I was entertained. And I enjoy not being bored.

It is strange that Scott Glenn's in this, but then again if someone came up to me and told me: we're gonna pay you to have fun with weapons and young half-naked girls, I'd probably say yes, too.

I want to criticize it some more, but it's oviously a film for teenagers: It's unapologetically over-the-top and as subtle as a sledgehammer to the balls. It's unalturated fun. As such, it works really well. There is also a pseudo-psychological theme to it, but I think it's just an excuse to go into her mind and see lots of shit explode.

Had I been younger, I'd have loved this film. But I am 35 and so just felt like a dirty old man.
And that's cool, I'm used to it.

In any case, if you're going to watch this film, watch it LOUD. In fact, I'm tempted to get the blu-ray just to listen to it extra loud.
Yeah, just for the sound. Because watching Ms Browning is not a factor whatsoever. Too bad she's a blonde in this, but hey: beggars can't be choosers. Anyway, the blu-ray will be longer and will be R-rated. So? What makes it R? Boobies? More blood?
I'm guessing more blood and a few curse words. Oh, well. In any case, to be honest: I don't have to watch this film again.

I don't have to. But I could, if it were loud enough.

But I won't. Instead I'll just make my own movie in my mind with Ms Browning.

So, I'm a perv', sue me! (Ah, fuck, you probably can...)

To sum up: it looks great, the girls look great, it's entertaining and most of the time is not pretending not to be, that is until the end where it tries to get deep and philosophical and spiritual, as if the director was justifying himself for having hot girls walk around in hot clothes for two hours ('It's about empowerment! Really, it is!')
But I enjoyed it more than '300' and 'Watchmen,' which were directed by the same guy as this.

PS: I was right about seeing John Hamm.

PPS: I'm really annoyed when in a film there's a character who looooooves cigars. I mean smoking cigars is important to him, it's part of his personality. And then he lights them with a Zippo. Come on! Zippos look bad ass, okay. But there are other lighters that look just as mean, surely and they're don't make your smoke smell like gasoline.